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"I believe the greater the handicap,
the greater the triumph."
John H. Johnson
the greater the triumph."
John H. Johnson
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Introduction
“My mother passed this evening at about 4:30pm and I am so confused that I do not know how or where to start from, this is totally devastating for me, too much for me to bear Shade.” Tears rolled down my cheeks as I spoke with my colleague on the phone that evening. Remembering My Dear Mother I can still remember that very evening when I got a phone call from my uncle that my mother passed a few minutes after I spoke with her on the phone. The pain, the confusion, the fear of handling the loss kept running through my mind, yet I was determined to give my mother a befitting funeral that she asked for. My mother had the premonition that she was going to die and based on that, she started telling me how she wanted her funeral to look like. She had even called a professional photographer and took photographs that we would use during her funeral, but I could not believe everything she was telling me until it happened. She had been sick for close to three months and at first we thought it was just minor pains, until she kept complaining of seeing dead people coupled with all kinds of dreams that she could not explain. My mother was on and off hospital bed without solution or any form of diagnosis. It was a very trying period for me, my uncles and siblings because of the fact that the Doctor or laboratory report could not find any specific problem other than pains. “The pain is getting worse by the day, I don’t think I can bear this anymore, it is better to go be with the lord” was what my mother told me on the phone one Saturday evening “mummy you will be fine” I replied. After that conversation my mother would call me and begin to tell me how she would want her funeral to be, the kind of casket; the people that would take the readings in church as well as the Rev. Father to lead the funeral Mass because she was a catholic. I remember then when I was scared of how to go about everything my mother told me before she passed, my friend, Jennifer was the one that stayed with me during that trying period. She kept encouraging me that I am a strong lady with a strong will. Jennifer said one that that gave me courage “Ebun, if your mother did not see you as being capable to handle her funeral with details she wouldn’t have been telling you because you are not the only child.” That was when I started getting my confidence. It is precisely eight years that my mother passed but the first one year was one I will not forget easily because I was close to my mother and we were used to speaking on the phone at 11pm every night and when she passed the vacuum was there which became difficult for me to erase but as years go by it keep fading away.
2 Comments
Julia
2/26/2019 10:30:18 am
I'm so sorry to hear about your mother, this must've been very hard for you to write about.
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Nadiia
2/26/2019 12:44:41 pm
I read somewhere... A person becomes really adult only after his/her mom passes away. I'm so sorry for your loss.
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